mulct: /muhlkt/

–verb (used with object)
1. to deprive (someone) of something, as by fraud, extortion, etc.; swindle.
2. to obtain (money or the like) by fraud, extortion, etc.
3. to punish (a person) by fine, esp. for a misdemeanor.
–noun
4. a fine, esp. for a misdemeanor.

how to use in casual conversation:

"i've never been mulcted quite like that before"
"i went to this party, and everyone was mulcting each other, it was awkward"

not to be confused with:

mulch

how it makes me feel:

in a word: bleggghhhh. this word is kinda gross. it reminds me of one of those really extreme sex acts involving someones rectum (damn near killed 'em) that you hear about so much about on the intertubes. it feels like it should be the name for what was happening on that 'two girls one cup' video. remember that? yeesh. not that there's anything wrong with that, i mean everybody has there own thing that they're into - but mulct feels icky to say. not only is the -lct ending awkward but the 'mu-' part just makes it feel like you just walked into a sex club to find your significant other contorted into a position you never would have though them capable, much less willing to put themselves into and surrounded by strangers doing things the marquee de sade would have been impressed with and the only thing they can manage to say to you is "we need to talk". which as we all know is one of the worst things you can hear when you're in a relationship and words that you should never say to another human being you're in a relationship with. speaking of which....

we need to talk:

right, so i got this new job. i'm excited. i'm pretty sure it's going to be fucking amazing. but my ability to blog will possibly be hampered by the fact that i might actually want to make a contribution to the overall harmony and functioning of the company i am to be working for. in other words, i think i'm gonna like this job and i don't want to screw it up by screwing off on the internet for the first hour of the day like i do now, at least not yet. so that leaves us with a few options.

• do entries as i am able too, even if posted later in the day or if a day gets skipped here or there.
• "what are you ambitious now!? f' your job, give me my posts!"
• retire it - we've had a good run
• retire it - i hate this blog anyways
• pass it off to someone with better grammar and spelling

being that you all's entertainment is the main reason i do this, i suppose what you think matters. so up there on the left of the WOTDuh page is a poll. you're input and feedback on the matter is appreciated. thanks, and have a sweet weekend.

WORD OFF!

gregarious: /gri-gair-ee-uhs/

1. fond of the company of others; sociable.
2. living in flocks or herds, as animals.
3. botany. growing in open clusters or colonies; not matted together.
4. pertaining to a flock or crowd.

vs.

proscribe: /prō-skrīb/

1: to publish the name of as condemned to death with the property of the condemned forfeited to the state
2: to condemn or forbid as harmful or unlawful

google readers:

don't forget to vote

last week's word winner:

TIE!

that's right - we have a tie. duplicity and flexuous both had an even number of votes. i actually didn't vote so in theory i could break the tie, kinda like the vice-president can in the senate but that's a little dictatorial - even for me. even then i don't think i'd actually want to pick one of them over the other. so we'll just say the two of them are equal and move on with our day.

abrupt: /uh-BRUPT/

1 a : characterized by or involving action or change without preparation or warning
b : unceremoniously curt
c : lacking smoothness or continuity
2 : giving the impression of being cut or broken off

how to use in casual conversation:

"i'm sorry for being abrupt with you earlier, it's just that i can't stand talking to you"

not to be confused with:

abscess

how it makes me feel:

i don't know what to say here. abrupt?! really?! abrupt!?!

do this for me - if you have never heard this word and had no idea what it's definition is, please leave a comment and tell me that i'm being to hard on MW for GIVING US THE STUPIDEST WOTDs EVER!!!

also:

i apologize for monday's entry. i got a a little hopped-up on hating bayer and didn't recognize the shear volume of spelling errors and typos (even though i DID spellcheck it, chowderhead) until much later. so, i am sorry.

RATE-A-WORD!

fructuous: /fruhk-choo-uhs/

productive; fertile; profitable

i guess dictionary is on an 'f-word' kick this week. yesterday they had fractious so i'm kind of interested to see where this one ends up taking us. it should be noted that the real 'f-word' is one of the greatest entries i have ever seen on dictionary or MW and everyone should take a look at it, not to mention slip it into speech whenever possible.

last week's result:

parlous

based on a weighted average of your votes, parlous is a:

4

(3.9375 to be precise)

i personally wasn't that impressed with parlous. i'm not sure why but it made me think of sarah palin. i don't get it either. so, i don't know if that's why i wasn't that into it or if it was because it felt a little banal (to me - i'm not judging). but you guys seemed to like it and that's what is important.

fractious: /frak-shuhs/

1. refractory or unruly
2. readily angered; peevish; irritable; quarrelsome

how to use in casual conversation:

"i find it exceptionally ridiculous that there are so many people leaving fractious comments about how much they hate facebook, on facebook."

not to be confused with:

fruticose

how it makes me feel:

i have for some time had a fractious relationship with the place i work. first of all, i'm a temp. which means that even though i've been here for over 18 months, i don't have vacation of sick time, i can't order things and that everyone in a while the company i work at (not for) finds an opportunity to remind me that they consider me a second class individual. that in addition to the fact that the company i work at (not for) has a long history of treating people horribly, not to mention institutionalized anti-semitism. this lovely company goes by the name of bayer. for starters, bayer was at one time a division of another company, IG Farben that was dissolved after world war II. why was it dissolved? well according to the internet (which never lies) IG Farben was "a conglomerate of German chemical industries that formed a part of the financial core of the German Nazi regime" and also controlled 42.5% of the company that manufactured zyklon b and had a hankering for using slave labor instead of paying people an honest wage for an honest days work (a tradition still carried on by bayer to this day, if only in spirit). additionally although aspirin had been around for sometime, it was a jewish scientist who was the first to create a formulation that wouldn't make you fart blood as a result of taking it. but being that he was jewish, the bayer corporation didn't exactly feel comfortable giving him credit. so they found a nice aryan boy, and said that he invented it. a story bayer sticks with to this day.

if that wasn't enough bayer also has had a hand in the distribution of genetically modified rice not deemed suitable for human consumption, the congolese civil war, negligent collection and distribution of HIV infected blood products not to mention a myriad of chemical poisonings, plant explosions and false claims that a multivitamin can prevent prostate cancer. but my fractious relationship with these fascism-loving jerks is coming to an end. last friday i was able to give bayer notice that i would no longer be it's bitch. i've got a new job with vacation, sick time, decent health insurance AND no potential for supporting the uber-capitalistic schemes of the world's 3rd largest pharmaceutical company.

yay!

WORD OFF!

duplicity: /doo-plis-i-tee/

deception, dissimulation.

vs

flexuous: /flek-sh(u-)ws/

1: having curves, turns, or windings
2: lithe or fluid in action or movement

last week's word winner:

panglossian

i don't even remember what this word means. according to M-W, it isn't panglossian but Panglossian, being named for some character in some freaking voltaire novel (damn voltaire). but as you may have noticed i am loathed to capitalize anything and my grammar leaves a little something to be desired. but, with 54% of the vote, panglossian is the winner.

RATE-A-WORD!

parlous: /pär-los/

1: obsolete dangerously shrewd or cunning
2: full of danger or risk : hazardous

yes indeedie! this rate-a-word is actually provided by MW today. shocking, i know. dictionary's WOTD was inexorable, which i liked but didn't seem appropriate for rate-a-word.

last week's results:

vitiate

based on a weighted average of your votes vitiate is a:

4

(3.9615384615384615384615384615385 to be precise)

i kinda liked this one and i'm happy with the result. thank ya'll for restoring my faith in athenian style democracy.

DAY OFF!

here are your WOTDs

dictionary

MW

WORD OFF!

panglossian: /pan-glä-sē-an/

: marked by the view that all is for the best in this best of possible worlds : excessively optimistic

vs.

coquetry: /koh-ki-tree/

1. the behavior or arts of a coquette; flirtation.
2. dalliance; trifling.

last week's word winner:

pecuniary

that was actually pretty freaking sweet - by far the best word off to date. but with 52% of the vote pecuniary is the winner.

aside:

good job to MW for not screwing the pooch for once.

tarradiddle: /tar-uh-did-l/

1. a small lie; fib.
2. pretentious nonsense.

how to use in casual conversation:

"he's one of those people who only seems to be capable of communicating in terradiddles"

not to be confused with:

pterodactyl

how it makes me feel:

this one makes me giddy. the suffix '-diddle' gives it a whimsical quality that makes me want to run through the cube farm frolicking in my underwear with no regard for being able to pay the rent. it's also a disarmingly gentle word for lying. i'm actually more into definition #2 - "pretentious nonsense". that alone makes the whole thing worth it. think about it - you know what nonsense is, you know what pretentious means, so how the hell would one identify 'pretentious nonsense'? the first thing that comes to mind is american apparel ads, which certainly are pretentious. just look at them. the whole thing is really designed to make you want to buy overpriced bandannas and gold colored windbreakers while frequently purchasing large quantities of cocaine to fuel the drug addled threesomes with tattooed girls in dive-bar-bathrooms. but is that nonsensical? i think that sounds like a friday night.

booyah!

seriously though. good WOTD, fun phonetics and a definition that you wouldn't associate with the word based solely on the way it sounds. me likey.

RATE-A-WORD!

vitiate: /vish-ee-eyt/

1. to impair the quality of; make faulty; spoil.
2. to impair or weaken the effectiveness of.
3. to debase; corrupt; pervert.
4. to make legally defective or invalid; invalidate

at the beginning of this year i started drinking a single cup of coffee in the morning and haven't had my afternoon crash ever since. this has nothing to do with anything. i just felt like there needed to be some words here and i'm pretty brain dead this morning, so it wasn't going to be anything pertinent. sorry.

results:

gelid

based on a weighted average of your votes gelid is a:

3

(3.3333333333333333333 to be precise)

it spent most of the week as a 4 and part of yesterday as a 2, but in the end it turned out to be a solid 3. i had higher hopes for gelid, but you all apparently had other ideas. democracy is stupid.

approbation: /ap-ruh-bey-shuhn/

1. approval; commendation.
2. official approval or sanction.
3. obsolete. conclusive proof.

how to use in casual conversation:

"i don't think that the approbation of NAMBLA for your political agenda is really something that you should consider as being positive"

not to be confused with:

reprobation

how it makes me feel:

this is certainly a monday WOTD. don't get me wrong here, it's a decent WOTD but as far as setting the tone for a day, this is definitely monday-appropriate. it's not really 'meh' but it is a little 'ehh' (less ugh. more thug). perhaps if it were tuesday i could get a little more excited about it. perhaps if lada gaga wasn't such a space alien i'd feel better about dancing to her music. coincidentally, while being hit on by a dude on saturday night i was told that "just dance" is essentially the soundtrack for his life. i knew at that point it would be polite to end the conversation not just because i don't bat for that team but also because even if i did i would never date ANYONE who said something like that. it definitely didn't help that he decided to have an in depth conversation with me about the implications of homosexuality in relation to the amount of hair you need to remove from your body, which was definitely gave me some yummy visuals. perhaps if he didn't have a penis i would have been interested. not to be vulgar or anything but in my opinion, vaginas are awesome.

distrait: /di-strey/

inattentive because of distracting worries, fears,

how to use in casual conversation:

"i've been so distrait about hearing back from this new job that i've been very unproductive at work this week"

not to be confused with

dire straits

how it makes me feel:

i must confess to liking this word. other than that it makes me feel tired. maybe it's not the words' fault, i've just felt drained all week and i haven't gotten drunk once. i did stay up too late watching the first season of lost, because it's streaming on netflix, but that was only once. the whole rest of the week i went to bed at a reasonable hour like the broken old man i'm turning in to, with my crickity knee and bum lungs forcing me to retire at an early hour. this is a monday word. don't get me wrong, i like it but if i was dictionary.com i would have picked something a little more upbeat to end the week with. something like butterfly, or rainbow or some other happily-dappily shit.

oh no.

i just said 'shit'.

fuck.

a kind note:

everybody have a nice weekend. i'll be celebrating the birth of one pink robot tomorrow night at a dive bar with an overtly racist mural on the wall and the entire closing time album on the jukebox. whoo ho! happy birthday al!

WORD OFF!

pecuniary: /pi-kyoo-nee-er-ee/

1. of or pertaining to money
2. consisting of or given or exacted in money or monetary payments
3. (of a crime, violation, etc.) involving a money penalty or fine.

vs.

vulnerary: /vol-ne-rer-ē/

used for or useful in healing wounds

last week's word winner:

machination

that wasn't even anything that even closely resembled something that anyone would ever possibly come close to considering a fair fight. machination was the lion, maxixe was the lame gazelle. machination was train, maxixe was the shopping cart. machination was the pitcher, maxixe was the catcher. you get the idea. machination is actually fairly high on my list of favorite words. it's just so damned foreboding.

i saw a thing on tv last night about how much google pays attention to what you do, read and say on the internet and then sells it to people like me who want you to go their site. google is kinda creepy. so if you're using reader to view this don't forget to vote.

aubade: /oh-bahd/

A song or poem greeting the dawn; also, a composition suggestive of morning.

how to use in casual conversation:

"after all the beer we drank last night, it was hard to avoid turning my usual aubade into a 'fuck-you' song"

not to be confused with:

auberge

how it makes me feel:

it's a pretty solid WOTD. it's sorta got the french thing going on, but that's really a personal problem of mine and not something any of you should worry about. it has a pretty specific definition - it isn't just a fancy word for a song or poem, but one specifically to greet the dawn. while this does conjure images of some douchebag standing on a bluff reciting his aubade, (sorry for the gender specific language, i don't know why i went that way) for some reason that doesn't bother me.

*thumbs up*

RATE-A-WORD!

gelid: /jel-id/

very cold; icy

remember when i was all bitter and angry? well, more bitter and angry than i am....this word would have come in handy back then. oh well.

results:

martinet

based on a weighted average of your votes martinet is a:

3

(3.3461538461538461538461538461538 to be precise)

don't forget to vote!

mondegreen: /mon-di-green/

a word or phrase resulting from a misinterpretation of a word or phrase that has been heard

how to use in casual conversation:

"i learned the hard way that excessive marijuana consumption and a filthy mind lead to hours of laughing at dirty mondegreens"

not to be confused with:

collared greens

how it makes me feel:

i like it! this is a fun word with fun implications across the board. i myself am a big fan of finding things that people say and turning it into a mondegreen. it's pretty entertaining. also, it's good to have a word for those weird little cultural moments where popular, or at least, well known lyrics and/or phrases are misconstrued to mean something else: the most famous of which being jimi hendrix's '' 'scuse me while i kiss this guy" ('scuse me while i kiss the sky). other notable mondegreens:

"thirty theives and the the thunder chief"- AC/DC (dirty deeds done dirt cheep)
"human bean" - my friend from high school (human being)

the list could go on for some time...

something that has nothing to do with anything that i feel i need to share:

so yesterday i went to breakfast in west seattle. on the way home i had to transfer buses downtown. i got off the bus at 3rd and pine and milled around while i checked the schedule. then i started to notice a ruckus between two caucasian males. one, (whom we will henceforth refer to as 'old man') was a clean-cut gentleman in his late 40's to early 50's with a full head of grey hair, wearing shorts. he wasn't a bum or anything but he wasn't an executive type either. the other was probably 20, or early 20's (whom we will henceforth refer to as 'punk ass' or 'the kid'). he had a puffy jacket, baggy jeans, baseball cap, shit-stache - pretty much looked exactly like what your preconceived notion of a white thuggy-tagger looking kid would make you think he looks like.

the old man had caught the punk ass doing something he shouldn't - i don't know exactly what. the part i heard started with the old man saying "i saw what you did, and there's cameras. you see those cameras there, they saw what you did". this caused the kid to fly into a rage. he started by saying "listen old man, you better shut your f__king mouth, you don't want any part of this". the old man then got a look on his face like he had opened up a big old can of worms and started walking away. punk ass kept after him as he walked down pine, intimidating him with check-swings and shit talking. then the kid did squiggly fingers on the old guys neck when the old guy told him not to touch him. the kid pretended to swing a few more times and the old guy kept flinching, obviously scared.

the old man then pushed punk ass, which i figured would be a big mistake for the old man and left me under the impression the old man's day was about to get a lot worse. then, as the kid recovered from the shove and came back at the old man:

BAM!

old man lands a left hook to the kids face! punk ass doubled back and fell to the ground. the old man then proceeded to jump on top of this little son-of-a-bitch and repeatedly punch him in the face before placing his hand over the kids mouth and saying something about him learning to keep his mouth shut. there was a fairly significant crowd as it is a fairly busy bus stop, all of which started laughing at the kid. popular sentiment was overwhelmingly sympathetic to the kid in the end though - as he had just gotten his ass kicked by an old man.

best. transfer. ever.